005. When Success Doesn't Equal Happiness (Building Differently, Part 1)

My son hit his first home run. He knocked it out of the park. And I wasn't there to see it.

I was in a hotel room in Manhattan, in my pajamas, eating room service chicken. I had the title. I had the career. I had everything I thought I wanted.

But I didn't have the life I wanted anymore.

This is Part 1 of a two-part series on building differently—about the moment I realized success doesn't equal happiness, the vision that changed everything, and why I walked away from corporate to start over.

In this episode:

• Why I started selling Blow Pops in eighth grade (and got called to the principal's office)
• The whisper I felt my whole life that wouldn't go away—even when corporate was working
• The phone call that changed everything: my son's home run moment
• The question that broke me open: "If time and money were no object, where would you be right now?"
• The gray sweatshirt vision—and why I cried in front of a room full of people
• Why I resigned a few weeks later and started completely over
• Why comfort can keep you paralyzed—and fear can be your fuel

Chapters:
1:23 – Born to Build: The Blow Pop Era
2:26 – Corporate Success, But Something Wasn't Right
5:41 – The Home Run Moment
7:51 – The Question That Changed Everything
10:18 – The Kitchen Vision Breakthrough
11:13 – Resign and Restart
12:32 – Fear as Fuel
13:48 – The Becoming Question

The Becoming Question:
Where have you been successful but not fulfilled?

Connect: @melissathompson.19

Watch/Listen: bellame.com/becomingher

You are not late. 

You are not behind. 

You are not finished. 

You are in the making.

Stay in the making.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

It was a wake-up call. My son, my baby boy, hit his first like home run. He knocked it literally out of the park, and I wasn't there to see it. It was his moment and I missed it. I missed it. I was not living in alignment with my life and what made me happy. I was missing everything. Sure, I had the success. I had the title. I had the career everybody wanted. But I didn't have the life that I wanted anymore. Welcome to Becoming Her. I'm Melissa Thompson. This is a podcast about lifelong evolution. For the woman who knows she's not finished, not behind, not late, just in the making. And that's exactly where you're supposed to be. Do people really choose entrepreneurship? Or does entrepreneurship choose them? Let's face it, this path is not an easy one. And I've been down both paths, that of corporate and entrepreneurship. And maybe had I known what I know now, I might have chosen to stick with the corporate path, but I didn't.

– Born to Build: The Blow Pop Era

SPEAKER_00 1:27

And sometimes that whisper laid on your heart, it just gets louder with every passing year. For me, it probably started when I was young. That calling, that whisper from the moment I was in grade school, I was begging my mother to purchase blow pops so I could take them to school in eighth grade and sell them to all the kids for 25 cents. And I remember this like it was yesterday. I wanted to be in charge of the money that I was getting. And as a little kid, blowpop, that was really my only solution. It was so successful that they called me into the principal's office to take away my ability to do that. And by the way, the following week or so, they launched it through the PTA. I still think they stole my idea. But even back then, as a young girl, I knew that there was something different, a different path, a different calling for

– Corporate Success, But Something Wasn't Right

SPEAKER_00 2:26

me. And as I entered the corporate world and began building in an industry that I truly love, beauty and wellness and entrepreneurship, working on the corporate side was something that I felt strong in my identity. I felt it was an affirmation of who I was, all the things, until it didn't. Because that little whisper that I initially first felt when I was young continued to build and grow and grow every single year. In fact, I worked with the world's top brands in my industry. I sat at the most glorious tables across the world in the corporate boardrooms. And every time I did, every time I took on a new role, something just wasn't right. In fact, my husband coined it as saying, you're like Goldilocks. You sit in the different rooms, in the different chairs, at the different tables, and you always feel that it's just not right. And what I was truly feeling was that little tiny whisper that was continuing to amplify till it became a roar. I knew that I wanted to build something of my own. The hard part was getting to that defining moment because I truly loved what I did. I loved my role as a corporate exec. And perhaps because it was structured and I knew what was needed of me, but it was a love-hate relationship because I always felt that it could be done differently. We could add to it, we could do more, but I wasn't calling the shots. When you're working for someone else, it is someone else's business, someone else's brand, what they're doing. And I just wanted to keep pushing. I just wanted to do more, be more. And that little feeling, that nudge just wouldn't go away. And I was able to kind of bury that nudge that I kept feeling, that whisper that kept amplifying until I couldn't, until alignment came into question. When you're aligned with something, it's easier to continue down that path. But when you start to feel misaligned, when things don't resonate with you, not only in perhaps the role that you have or what is being produced from that role, it starts to become crystal clear. And for me, that crystal clear moment came at me quick. It was a moment in time, and I can remember it like it was yesterday, that I realized you could be so successful yet so unhappy. I had everything when it came to the terms of a career. I had the role, I had the position, I had the title, I had everything that I wanted. But that success did not equate to my happiness.

– The Home Run Moment

SPEAKER_00 5:41

I remember the one day I flew into New York and the corporate offices for the brand that I was with was there. And I flew in weekly for a few days a week from California to New York, stayed at a beautiful hotel, had the biggest room because I was always there. I was always traveling. They always put me in this amazing room in Manhattan. I got in on a Sunday because I had early morning Monday meetings that particular weekend. I had just ordered room service for dinner, got in my PJs, was thinking everything's great and I'm going to have an early night. And this is this is the life, right? Until I received a phone call that to this day I can feel it through my bones. It was a wake-up call. My son, my baby boy, hit his first like home run. He knocked it literally out of the park and I wasn't there to see it. They called me. I remember my chicken. I can remember looking at the chicken and the asparagus. As crazy as that sounds, when it hits you, you'll remember every moment of that. And I'm on the call, so excited. I started crying out of happiness. He was, it was his moment, and I missed it. I missed it. I was not living in alignment with my life and what made me happy. I was missing everything. Sure, I had the success, I had the title, I had the career everybody wanted, but I didn't have the life that I wanted anymore. And then all of a sudden, that whisper on my heart, that alignment that I felt before was replaced with a fire alarm that I could not shut off in my brain.

– The Question That Changed Everything

SPEAKER_00 7:51

Soon after I was hosting an event in Los Angeles for a few hundred people. And I had asked a few of them to get up and speak on behalf of kind of their expertise. Some was time management, some were about like networking, all kinds of different things. And I sat at the front of the room alongside next to my assistant. And I'm used to these speeches. I hear all of it. I'm paying attention. And one lady gets up to talk about if time and money were no object, well, I heard this a billion times. And I was paying attention, but I didn't think it would be anything different. As she began to speak her words that would forever change my life, she said, if time and money were no object, where would you be right now? And again, I thought, okay, here we go. This is wonderful. Everybody will learn a lot from it, right? And she said, Close your eyes, everybody. And I had to close my eyes because I'm in the front of the room. These are all individuals who who reported to me at the time and my assistants next to me, I closed my eyes. And I went with it. And she said, if time and money were no object, where would you be right now? She asked the question again. Said, not what car is in the driveway, not how much money is in your bank account. If time and object were not an issue, where do you see yourself physically standing in that moment? Look around. What color is on the wall? What room are you in? What are you physically doing, living that life? What are you wearing? I started crying. Eyes still closed. I couldn't hold it anymore. And luckily, she went to break right after that. My assistant was like, Are you okay? And I said, No, I'm fine. If I have to go make a call. I ran out and did what most people do when they really need to talk to someone. I called my mom from the foyer of that hotel. And I told her what just happened. And as I told her what I saw, she knew what was happening.

– The Kitchen Vision Breakthrough

SPEAKER_00 10:18

You see, I saw in my vision when I closed my eyes, I was standing in my kitchen. I had just made breakfast for my boys. I had my laptop open, a cup of coffee, keys on the counter because I was going to the gym and I had a gray flash dance sweatshirt on. I don't know if you've ever seen that movie, but it was the gray off-the-shoulder sweatshirt that she dances in. And I, it was me. I could see it. But the reason I was crying was because that was so polar opposite of my life. I had just heard about my son's home run. I had been away. I traveled. I had an office in Pasadena, an office in Manhattan, an office in Chicago. I wasn't home. That wasn't me. I didn't even own a gray sweatshirt.

– Resign and Restart

SPEAKER_00 11:13

I knew something had to change at that moment. And it did. Within the next few weeks, I resigned. I started completely over. And I knew I was going to design my own future. And entrepreneurship was in that near future. And I'd like to tell you that once I did that, the rest was a fairy tale. It wasn't. Because, like so many of you out there, there is not one straight path to your happiness or success. And there are twists and detours in every single road. But if you keep your mind set on the end goal, which is truly just your happiness and being aligned in what you're doing and loving the life that you have, all of the twists and turns that you have to go to get there, they're just a simple, small pit stop along

– Fear as Fuel

SPEAKER_00 12:32

the way. If you're scared, if you're frightened, I say run with that fear. That's the fuel that will keep you moving. If it doesn't scare you, it's usually not big enough or not worthy of your attention. You have to get uncomfortable. It's too easy to find comfort in the norm, even if the norm is something you're no longer aligned with, even if it's something that doesn't elevate you. And in fact, that alarm is going off for you inside your head. Comfort can keep you paralyzed. Fear can keep you paralyzed. You're in control of your own destiny. And life truly is what you make it. The choices are clear. You can either settle in being comfortable, or you can thrive in your happiness and your destiny, even if there's a little discomfort to get there. And because this subject deserves so much more attention, in part two, I'm going to be speaking to that discomfort and how I dared to get out of the comfort zone and build something that I had wished existed.

– The Becoming Question

SPEAKER_00 13:48

But before we do, I have a becoming question for you. Where have you been successful but not fulfilled? Thank you for joining in. And remember, friend, you are not late. You're not behind. You're not finished. You are still in the making. Keep becoming. Thanks for being here. If you know someone who needs to hear this, send it to them. And if this resonated with you, comment down below. I'd love to keep this conversation going. Make sure to follow along on YouTube and Instagram for daily updates. You can find everything in the description. See you next time.